Saturday, September 29, 2012

Terry Francona Ready to Bring Bubble Gum Wads back to Dugouts.

Once a manager, always a manager I suppose. News broke earlier today that Terry Francona was among two acknowledged candidates for the open managerial position in Cleveland. I can only assume that they are waiting to publicly announce my candidacy once they have realized that my ability to chew and maintain substantial amounts of bubble gum far surpasses that of Tito.

That's right Terry, I said I can chew more gum than you. What of it?
Sure, Francona does have 1,029 career wins, he may have managed two World Series Championship winning teams, but my three year running record on World Series Baseball of 481-5 has yet to be matched by any of my basement dwelling, Dungeons and Dragons loving friends. And two World Series titles, pssssh, please, I won three in a row. The only thing Terry really has on me (besides the small detail of actually stepping onto a big league field), is that, apparently, he's got the inside track with Indians GM Chris Antonetti.

"I actually speak to Chris from time to time," Francona told MLB.com. "We've been friends a long time. But I have spoken to him about the job, and at some point I'm going to come in and interview for that job." via MLB.com
Nice Terry, very nice. That's OK though. I'm not really concerned that you guys are planning a backpacking trip across Europe this fall. I plan on wooing my buddy Chris (hey Chris, call me) with my famous spaghetti and meatballs. What now? *head shake, hands up* That's just how I roll Ti-to.

And no, I'm not really concerned about Sandy Alomar Jr. because, c'mon, the guy only has one Major League win as a manager.

Francona is apparently interested since he told MLB.com that; "I wouldn't come in and interview if I wasn't interested." and that's fine. Maybe he'll see some of the sights in big city Cleveland, or shoot over to Cincinnati for the day, it's his money. But I've got Madame Cleo, and she told me for a small fee of $793.26 that I've already got the job, Mr. Antonetti just hasn't realized it yet. I think I'm gonna spend the rest of the day looking at homes in the Cleveland suburbs, or maybe I can get the apartment next to Drew Carey.

Just remember these two words Chris; Chicken, Beer. Do you really want that kind of debacle happening in your clubhouse? Yeah, I didn't think so. I'll be waiting for your call.

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