Curveballs for Jobu 8/28/11

Curveballs for Jobu is the trip around the ballparks Offbasepercentage keeps forgetting to take.

Today's honorary bat boy is Jody Reed.


[Reed autographed 1991 Score card. Estimated value: 8 kidney beans]


Indians 8, Royals 7. Cleveland trailed 7-5 in the bottom of the eighth when Asdrubal Cabrera launched a three-run home run to put the Tribe ahead for good. That was Cabrera's 21st home run, which leads all Asdrubals.

Pirates 7, Cardinals 0. Chris Carpenter came into his Saturday start with a 2.33 ERA in 19 career starts against the Pittsburgh, but the Overbays got to the right-hander for six earned. That's not only the most he's ever allowed to the Pirates, but the most since surrendering seven to the Reds May 15. You know who else gave up seven runs that day? Brian Duensing.

Angels 8, Rangers 4. The California Angels Based Out of Anaheim hit five home runs Saturday, including one from rookie Mike Trout, MTD's new imaginary boyfriend since Chase Utley extended the restraining order to 1,000 feet.

MTD after Trout's home run: "I want to take him to prom."

Devilrays 6, Bluejays 5. While watching this game I was forced to look at this logo



and that wasn't a nice thing for the Bluejays to do.

Tigers 6, Twins 4. Carl Pavano: 6 2/3 IP, 5 ER, 2 HR, LOSS.

Dodgers 7, Rockies 6 (11). A day after becoming the fastest Dodger to reach the 30-30 plateau, Matt Kemp hit a walk-off home run in the 11th as LA won its fifth straight game.

Whitesox 3, Mariners 0. Ken Harrelson's pick to click, Johnny Danksy, twirled a three-hit shut out and had 10 hegones! The Seattle offense, which had been lost for months, was finally spotted in a grocery store parking lot in Livingston, Montana.

"I told you it was in Livingston!"

- Fake Mariners fan fighting with his girlfriend

Diamondbacks 3, Padres 1. Fantasy Watch: Aaron Cunningham: 0-for-4.

Yankees at Orioles DH ppd John Habyan
Marlins at Phillies DH ppd hot dog bun riot
Braves at Mets ppd Chip Caray skinned knee



Other games, but down here....

Reds 6, Nationals 3
Brewers 6, Cubs 4
Redsox 9-4, Athletics 3-0
Giants 2, Astros 1 (10)

Curveballs for Jobu 5/24/11

Curveballs for Jobu is Offbasepercentage's daily trip around the ballparks.

Today's honorary bat boy is Stan Hoyer.

Cardinals 3, Padres 1.
Albert Pujols hit a home run ending his gajillion at bat drought without one. Okay, maybe it was just 106 at bats but it was the longest of his career and an excruciating stretch for his fantasy owners. Pujols has just 8 homers this season and an underwhelming .268/.340/.421 line in his walk year. If Pujols puts up the worst season of his career, we're going to witness some very interesting contract negotiations in the offseason.

Brewers 11, Nationals 3.
Corey Hart erupted for 3 home runs giving him 3 on the season. Tom Gorzelanny did his best impression of a batting cage pitching machine giving up 2 of Hart's homers and another one by Prince Fielder.

Phillies 10, Reds 3.
Chase Utley made his much anticipated (by me) return to the Phillies. He went 0-5 but I'm sure he'll hit like 8 home runs tonight. Placido Polanco, Jimmy Rollins and Raul Ibanez hit home runs to celebrate Utley's return. I celebrated with Sailor Jerry rum and Camel menthols because I'm the paragon of health.

Rangers 4, White Sox 0.
The Rangers welcomed back 2/3 of their opening day outfield and Josh Hamilton and Nelson Cruz wasted no time getting back into the groove, each hitting a home run. Alexi Ogando continued his improbable hot start throwing a complete game shutout lowering his ERA to 1.81. By all accounts (metrics), he's actually much closer to his 3.68 FIP or 3.75 xFIP. Still pretty good though. The White Sox started Dallas McPhearson at third base and that always makes me laugh. He went 0-3 and has a .182/.182/.182 line. Adorable.

Blue Jays 7, Yankees 3.
It was just another regular day at the office for Jose Bautista. Joey Bats went 1-3 with his 19th homer and 2 more walks. Derek Jeter and Jorge Posada combined to go 0-9 but Posada at least played near perfect defense at DH.

Indians 3, Red Sox 2.
Okay, I give up. The Indians are the best team in baseball and Asdrubal Cabrera is an MVP candidate. This is all happening with Grady Sizemore and Travis Hafner on the disabled list and Shin-Soo Choo and Carlos Santana not hitting. It's just weird and I'm pretty sure Charlie Sheen has something to do with it.

Other games, but down here...
Angels 4, A's 1.
Tigers 6, Rays 3.
Mariners 8, Twins 7 (10).
Astros 4, Dodgers 3.