Umpires Now Escorted To Games By Stormtroopers

We finally have photographic evidence that MLB umpires do indeed work for the dark side of the force. They're evil. Frankly, I'm surprised Joe West only ejects players and managers instead of electrocuting them with lightning bolts from his hands. And let's face it, Bud Selig is looking more like the Emperor every day.

Or it was Star Wars day at AT&T Park. That would actually make more sense. The Sci-Fi promotional day catered to Bay area nerds with a pregame costume contest party and a postgame screening of The Empire Strikes Back. More importantly, the Giants gave away this sweet Brian Wilson-Han Solo frozen in carbonite figurine thingy.


If that doesn't help you score with the ladies, it's probably because you're covered in Cheeto dust. Seriously, clean yourself up, man.

Unfortunately for Giants fans, Stars Wars day at AT&T wasn't all droids high-fiving and Wookies chugging beer. The Giants lost to the Diamondbacks 4-1 and fell seven games behind Arizona in the West. Cody Ross hit a lead-off home run but the Giants only managed a Carlos Beltran triple and an Aubrey Huff single for the rest of the game.

It's going to take a miracle the size of Luke Skywalker destroying the Death Star for the Giants to make the playoffs. Although it wouldn't surprise me if Tim Lincecum used to bull's-eye womp rats in his T-16 back home.

Baby Giraffe Meets Brandon Belt, Or Vice Versa

In a story so sickeningly adorable I actually threw up in a pink Red Sox hat, Brandon Belt recently took pictures with the baby giraffe named after him. While the Giants rookie first baseman isn't enjoying the ROY caliber season many of us expected, Belt did become the recipient of a nickname spreading in popularity just as quickly as teammate Pablo Sandoval's "Kung-Fu Panda" did. Announcer Duane Kuiper bestowed the nickname "Baby Giraffe" upon Belt due to his, let's say, lack of grace in the outfield.

The fans like it and so does Six Flags Animal Kingdom which named a giraffe born last Friday after the Giant. The giraffe Brandon, 6'2, is already closing in on the real Brandon, 6'5. All right, get ready to be nauseated by cuteness. Here are the pictures of the two meeting thanks to The Veteran and the Rook blog...


Brandon explaining,"Opulence, I has it."


Baby Giraffe caught looking at an 0-2 off speed pitch.


Tim Lincecum is going to be so pissed Brandon Belt fed that to a giraffe.

Believing In Brandon Belt

Friend of Off Base and talented writer, Julian Levine of Splashing Pumpkins, and I shared a pre-season prediction about Brandon Belt winning the National League Rookie of the Year. But after some early hiccups, Julian had to swing by to remind me not to give up on Belt. Here's the guest post.

Coming into 2011, Brandon Belt hype was at an all-time high. And, well, why wouldn't it be? The 2009 fifth-round pick had rocketed himself into top prospect status, hitting .352/.455/.620 across three levels of the minors in his first professional season. Belt was the real deal. A guy who combined astounding plate discipline with solid power, gold glove potential at first, a strong arm, and acute baserunning skills.

I myself had immediately fallen in love with Belt for one particular reason: his on-base abilities. Over the last three seasons, the San Francisco Giants had ranked 21st, 30th, and 28th in the majors in BB%, so it was refreshing to see a guy who could draw walks.

Anyway, everything with respect to Belt looked good entering the season. He had ranked 23rd in Baseball America's top 100 prospects list, and Keith Law had him at 17th overall. Dan Szymborski had released his 2011 Giants ZiPS projections on January 4, and Belt was forecasted to hit .266/.357/.440 as a rookie. Not too shabby. And of course, in Spring Training, Belt began where he'd left off -- posting a .282/.338/.479 slash line over 72 at-bats.

He looked ready for the majors, but few expected him to start the year there. Service time issues and a crowded roster would most likely leave him starting the year in Triple-A Fresno. That was, until Cody Ross suffered a calf injury that put him on the Disabled List to start the season. Belt would enter 2011 as the Giants' starting first baseman. I was excited.

But things didn't go so well. In 52 at-bats, he struck out 13 times, and he seemed to be hitting the ball on the ground too much (22 GB/13 FB). The plate discipline was there (eight walks in 60 PAs), but Belt just seemed too passive at the plate, and the consensus among scouts was that he needed more seasoning:

He needs more time in the minor leagues. Pitchers are disrupting his timing. He isn’t confident up there. He still has terrific plate discipline, but we all know rookies cannot always count on getting the borderline calls from umpires.

So when Cody Ross was activated from the DL on April 20, Belt was optioned to Triple-A. Where he promptly returned to raking. In his second Triple-A stint, Belt OPS'd .994 over 132 PAs; and in the wake of the notorious Buster Posey collision, Belt received a call-up.

Of course, as luck would have it, Belt landed on the Disabled List just two games into his second run at the majors, as a hit-by-pitch left a small fracture in his left wrist.

The latest update has Belt returning within two weeks. From what I've seen, he's not an adequate defensive left-fielder, and with Aubrey Huff heating up (OPSing over .900 in the month of June), Belt will have to fight for playing time at first. But I still can't wait to see what he does.

At the beginning of the year, I had Brandon Belt winning the 2011 Rookie of the Year. In retrospect, that prediction looks rather ridiculous -- as we all know ROY awards are built for RBI machines, not on-base machines (just ask Jason Heyward). Nevertheless, my expectations remain high. Belt will get on base. He won't be a slugger, but he should be able to hit as many as 20 home runs over the course of a full season. And he's still got that plus glove at first base.

Over the past few years, the Giants have developed some pretty nice homegrown talent -- Madison Bumgarner, Buster Posey, and Pablo Sandoval to name a few. And though things haven't gone well so far this year for Belt, the Giants seem to have developed yet another gem to add to their collection.

Thanks Julian. You can read more of his work at Splashing Pumpkins, Beyond the Boxscore and MLB Daily Dish. He's busy. You can also follow him on Twitter @SPGiantsBlog.

Brian Sabean Is An Idiot

Nobody is happy about Scott Cousins' collision at home plate with Buster Posey which, unfortunately, ended the Giants superstar catcher's season. I'm not happy about it, Buster isn't happy about it, Cousins isn't happy about it but Giants GM Brian Sabean is being a jerk about it...

Giants general manager Brian Sabean on Thursday tore into Scott Cousins of the Florida Marlins for his devastating hit on Buster Posey, saying the Giants will have a "long memory" of the play and everyone in the organization will be happy if Cousins is through as a major-league player.

*snip*

The GM's harshest statements in the lengthy interview came when co-host Ralph Barbieri noted that Posey had no desire to hear from Cousins.

"I don't blame the kid," Sabean said of Posey. "Why not be hard-nosed? If I never hear from Cousins again, or he doesn't play another day in the big leagues, I think we'll all be happy."

Cousins wasn't much of a major leaguer to begin with but he is built like a linebacker and crushed Posey at the plate. The ensuing injury led to varying opinions ranging from it was an intention hit to rules should be changed/enforced to Posey could have had better technique. However you view the incident, the result is the same. It's a crushing blow to the Giants and one of baseball's rising stars.

But Sabean's radio rant bothered me and I'm sure some front office folk will be calling for a public apology. Cousins, by all means, seemed upset about the outcome of the play and tried reaching out to Posey. If Posey didn't/doesn't want to hear an apology, I can't fault him, he did lose his season after all, but I tend to think cooler heads will prevail. Sabean, on the other hand, flat out wished ill on a professional baseball player.

While I realize this was largely an emotional reaction, Sabean is representing a Major League franchise and should have some professional tact. That was, and will continue to be, a legal play in the eyes of Major League Baseball. Blocking the plate and charging the catcher are baseball fixtures that will take years to overcome if a change in philosophy is, and might be, warranted. It's unjust for Sabean to so harshly criticize Cousins for a play baseball taught him his whole career.

Even Pablo Sandoval Is Getting In Shape?

Let's face it, we're 10 days into the new year and you're actually up three pounds from the time that you announced this was the year you'd finally get in shape. But all you've done is driven by the gym twice and learned how to roll your own breakfast burritos using pancakes, sausage and cookie dough. As long as we're being honest, I never really had much faith in you anyway.

But dammit, I only have a few fat baseball players left in the MLB and I don't appreciate them trying to improve themselves. First Bartolo Colon is attempting a comeback by not being fat and now Pablo Sandoval is trying to shed some of his panda weight to improve on his disappointing 2010 season. Here are the deets from Henry Schulman from the SF Gate...

Dunston has not seen Sandoval this winter, but Rich Aurilia has.

Aurilia lives in Phoenix and told me today he saw Pablo at a shopping mall just before Christmas. Sandoval told him he had lost 17 pounds.

Last week, Sandoval was in Venezuela and held a news conference at a baseball museum. According to reports in the Venezuelan papers, Sandoval said he lost 16 "kilos" with the goal of dropping 24 by the start of spring training. I've been told that something got lost in the translation and he meant "pounds." Sixteen kilos would be more than 35 pounds. Twenty-four kilos would be nearly 53 pounds. Nobody's expecting Sandoval to slim down that much.

Let's hope something was lost in translation. I'll be crushed if Sandoval went all Al Roker on us and looks like a deflated balloon version of himself playing third base. I've grown to love the Sandoval who roams the infield like a Hungry-Hungry-Hippo with what appears to be a mustard stain of his jersey and/or pants.

Giants fans surely will be pleased that Sandoval is working on bouncing back after his slash line tumbled from .330/.387/.556 to .268/.323/.409 in just one year. But as a fan of fat baseball players, I'll be sending care packages to Bobby Jenks and hoping for a David Wells comeback.

Your World Series Stars, Simpsons Style

The Rangers and the Giants are about to kick off Game One and I'm sure you've all been previewed to death by now. So, I've decided to take the good old Off Base Percentage method and rip off some old ideas and make them my own. Today we'll take a look at some of the key World Series players as their animated counter parts from The Simpsons.

Texas Rangers

1. Josh Hamilton as Sober Barney Gumble
When Barney was the town drunk, he wasted potential left and right. But once Barney got sober, he learned to fly a helicopter and saved the Simpson children from a sure forest fire death in Days of Wine and Do'h'ses. The sober version of Josh Hamilton is this year's ALCS MVP and probably the AL MVP.

2. Cliff Lee as Troy McClure
You may remember Cliff from such teams as the Cleveland Indians, Philadelphia Phillies, Seattle Mariners and Texas Rangers. No matter where Cliff Lee pitches though, he always puts together a brilliant performance.

3. C.J. Wilson as Ned Flanders
Wilson seems to be one of the nicest guys in baseball and as straight edge as they come according to his Twitter handle @str8edgeracer. I doubt Ned shares Wilson's racing enthusiasm after the "Maude incident."

4. Vlad Guerrero as Nelson Muntz
Like Nelson, Vlad will take a swing at just about anything and when it connects, it hurts.

5. Nelson Cruz as Fat Tony
When Cruz is actually active and on the show, he's one of the most dangerous players in baseball. He just needs more air time.

6. Colby Lewis as Apu Nahasapeemapetilon
Lewis came over from another country (after spending two season in Japan) and has done nothing but excel at his job. Except for the time he gave the clubhouse salmonella after bringing in some expired ham.

7. Jeff Fancoeur as Grandpa
Francoeur is also afraid to walk for fear of breaking a hip. At least that's what I assume his reasoning is.

8. Bengie Molina as Comic Book Guy
Both are slow, easily winded and rarely helpful.

9. Michael Young as Mr. Burns
Young has a ton of cash now after signing a 5-year, $80 million contract but neither one of them are as feared as they used to be.

10. Elvis Andrus as Maggie Simpson
Andrus is young and talented just like his counterpart. And I never heard him speak either.

San Francisco Giants

1. Buster Posey as Bart Simpson
Posey has been a star since he made it to TV. He has the potential to carry the Giants through some otherwise disappointing stretches.

2. Tim Lincecum as Otto Mann
Too obvious? Sorry. They both have long hair, drive too fast and enjoy the occasional joint. I'm guessing they both smell like patchouli as well.

3. Brian Wilson as Homer Simpson
Two crazy characters. Wilson is getting more press after his "The Machine" stunt. He appears to have a wacky sense of humor or is completely insane. Plus, he's a guy who you'd definitely want to go party with considering his plans following winning the NLCS were to, "Rage, get minimal sleep and do it again." That has Homer written all over it.

4. Cody Ross as Sideshow Bob
Ross shows up once a season, makes a big splash and then isn't heard from for the rest of the year. Side note: I have a slap bet with a friend about Cody Ross hitting another home run this post season. I have the under and probably just jinxed myself.

5. Pablo Sandoval as Chief Wiggum
Neither of them are any good at their positions on defense but they do share a certain round physique.

6. Aubrey Huff as Jimbo Jones
Huff flies under the radar but he is a strong hitter.

7. Pat Burrell as Moe Szyslak
I don't think you can characterize either of them having a pleasant disposition. Moe is ugly (physically) and is hidden in a dark bar and Pat is ugly (defensively) and hidden in left field.

8. Edgar Renteria as Disco Stu
Their best years were in the 1970's.

9. Aaron Rowand as Krusty the Clown
This one might be a reach but Rowand's contract constantly keeps me laughing due to his poor performances.

10. Matt Cain as Lisa Simpson
Cain isn't the star of the show but he always brings his A game. I feel like I should apologize for that one.

Okay kids, who did I miss?

Atlanta at San Francisco

As soon as I start a baseball blog, the Angels miss the playoffs for the first time since 2006. I hope you like your post-season previews filled with animosity and tears.

The Braves and the Giants will be the last series to get started Thursday at 8:37 CT. I spent a good chunk of my life living in Atlanta, dealing with Braves fans, both the wishy-washy kind and the dozen or so real ones. They're all annoying if you were wondering. Not quite Yankees or Red Sox fans annoying but still. I do have some pretty strong admiration for Tommy Hanson and Jason Heyward and spent many a drunken days at The Ted. That said, get ready for a heavy dose of Buster Posey love (also from Georgia).

My Completely Biased Opinion.
The Giants' rotation looks much better on paper than that of the Braves who will trot out Derek Lowe to open the series against Tim Lincecum and probably pitch him on short rest if there is a fourth game. If you've read this far, you probably know that Buster Posey is a blog favorite. I expect him to hit somewhere around .900 for the series.

Just Some of the Facts M'am.
Buster Posey hit 18 home runs and .305/.357/.505 in 443 plate appearances with the Giants in his rookie season. Posey's NL ROY competition, Jason Heyward, hit 18 home runs and .277/.393/.456 in 180 more plate appearances. Say what you will about the extra service time but, for me, Poesy>Heyward for this season. Lincecum had his worst season since his 24 rookie starts in 2007, pitching 3.43/3.15/3.21 (ERA/FIP/xFIP) while only striking out 9.79 per 9 innings. But that still trumps Lowe's 4.00/3.89/3.65 line. The Giants follow Lincecum with Matt Cain and Jonathan Sanchez to round out the best playoff rotation not based in Philadelphia. The Braves have a solid rotation too with Tommy Hanson and Tim Hudson. But if the pitching matchup in game 4 is actually Madison Bumgarner vs Brandon Beachy, Braves fans better start to worry.

Prediction.
Pitching + Posey = NLCS. There's a little more math that goes into that formula but simplified it for you. You're welcome. Giants in 4.

Andres Torres' Golden Sombrero: Legal PED Edition

A golden sombrero is awarded to a player who manages to strike out four times in a single game (real golden sombrero not included). It's quite the feat unless you're Ryan Howard or Mark Reynolds. Unfortunately, cycles and no-hitters are all the rage nowadays. Not for me, though. I will pour over the box scores to bring you the finest at swinging and missing.

Andres Torres is enjoying his breakout season with the Giants at the ripe age of 32-years-old. Torres bounced around baseball since 1998 but never had more than 185 major league plate appearances in a season (2003 with Detroit) until this year. In his 455 career PA's, Torres had 7 home runs and a .232/.290/.372 line. But this season, at 32-years-old and in 398 plate appearances, Torres has 11 home runs and a .286/.372/.506 line. Late bloomer? Change in approach?

Actually, he was diagnosed with ADHD and now legally takes Adderall. Now, the Adderall could have helped his concentration and that's why he's miraculously turned around what was just a minor league career. Or he's found one of the performance enhancing drug loopholes. Adderall is basically speed which was the PED of choice in the 70's. For some reason, we choose to ignore that Hall of Famers were taking illegal substances in the 70's to boost performance but we're up in arms over the steroid usage of the late 90's and 2000's.

Okay, sorry. That rant felt long overdue. None of the PEDs in the world could have helped Andres Torres yesterday. He went 0-4 with 4 strikeouts. Let's take a look at how many times that came from the right arm of Ubaldo Jimenez...

Top 1st: Torres struck out swinging against Jimenez. Jimenez brought his good stuff to the park yesterday and K'ed 9 so this probably wasn't just a "concentration" issue for Torres.

Top 3rd: Torres struck out swinging against Jimenez again. Okay, maybe you could look into upping those 40 MG of Adderall.

Top 6th: Torres struck out swinging against Jimenez. Again, that's an MTD Hat Trick. He struck out 3 times, the same way, against the same pitcher. Why isn't this catching on? Are you not telling your friends? Why doesn't Joe Buck return my texts?

Top 8th: Torres struck out swinging against Matt Belisle.

Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

It may seem like I advocate drinking here with the shot recipes and drinking jokes but alcohol makes you do stupid things kids. Drunk dialing, drunk texting, drunk showing up at your ex's bar. All poor decisions after 2 am. Trust me. That said, let's take the shot of the night while I try to shake off some shame. The shot of last night is a California Dream: 2 oz 1800® Tequila, 1 oz sweet vermouth, 1/2 oz dry vermouth, 1 maraschino cherry and it's in honor of Buster Posey.

I realize I need to stop gushing over Buster Posey before Chase Utley and Mike Trout get jealous but he's just so good. Posey extended his hit streak to 18 games, going 4-5 and moving his slash line to .371/.407/.579. While Posey is a blog favorite, those are MVP caliber numbers. And he's a catcher. This brings up 2 questions. 1) How bad did Tampa Bay screw up in the 2008 draft by passing on Posey when they needed a catcher? 2) Bengie Molina?

Honorable Mention: Dan Haren
While the San Francisco Poseys were beating the Diamondbacks in extra innings, the Angels were beating their GM in making trades. You can catch my analytical/non-biased reaction on the trade here (now with 300% more bias) but Dan Haren was a pretty big winner without even playing last night. He gets to go play in his native SoCal for an annual playoff contender while the Diamondbacks are trending toward Pittsburgh Pirate territory. Haren's escape from the dessert to the beach is one of the best sand moves since that hour glass got the job on Days of Our Lives.



That reference was brought to you via my grandma. I promise I don't watch soap operas. Unless you count Gossip Girl.

Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

Sorry about shot of the night being late again but I've been in a strikeout coma. And as soon as I'm finished with this shot, I'm going back to writing about Golden Sombreros. Seriously hitters, it was cute when you used to give me maybe a 4 strikeout performance once a week. But 6 in 2 days? Anyway, last night's shot of the night was Cane and Abel: 2-2.5 oz rum, 1/2 can Red Bull® energy drink and it's in honor of Matt Cain. I'm actually proud of what I did there, screw you.

Cain threw 8 shutout innings to improve his record to 8-8. He allowed 3 hits and 3 walks but struck out 9. Cain is overshadowed by Tim Lincecum in San Francisco but I always thought he was an underrated pitcher. Turns out he's never had an xFIP under 4.22 and his BABIP is almost always way under .300. It makes him a pretty interesting case. He's either always lucky or his normal BABIP is actually closer to .275 than .300. Even when you remove fielding, he out performs his FIP every season. Can anybody smart out there explain why that is to me?

Honorable Mention: Cole Hamels
Hamels threw 8 innings of 1-hit, shutout ball but didn't get a decision. That would have never happened if Chase Utley was healthy. But luckily for the Phillies, Dom Brown should be on the way. Unfortunately for the Phillies, they'll have to move Jayson Werth instead of Raul Ibanez.

Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

Tonight's shot of the night is Triple Ugly: 1/3 oz white tequila, 1/3 oz Jagermeister® herbal liqueur, 1/3 oz vodka. *shudders* Obviously, the shot is in honor of Bengie "Wheels" Molina.

Buster Posey who? Bengie Molina hit for the cycle tonight with a grand slam. That's right, Bengie Molina hit a triple tonight. It's actually the 6th of his career. Bengie Molina, known for his blistering speed, made it to third in a shade under 4 minutes after the Red Sox outfield spontaneously combusted. Or at least that's what I assume happened. Molina hit the slam and his triple in his final two at bats. He was pinch run for after the triple because his legs didn't make it past second base. I don't know what else to say. It's simply stunning. Bengie now has as many triples as Chone Figgins this season. On the Molina speed scale, I run a 4 which means I can see the finish line before I fall down and light a cigarette.

Honorable Mention: Barry Zito
From a former Giant to a current one. After a few ugly seasons in San Francisco following his monster deal, Zito almost got his ERA back under 4.00 last season. Tonight was Zito's best outing yet, tossing 8 innings of 2-hit, 10-strikeout ball. With the mediocre resurgence of Vernon Wells and Zito, Alfonso Soriano is now the proud owner of the worst contract in baseball.

Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

Tonight's shot of the night is a SoCo Giant: 1/2 Southern Comfort® peach liqueur, 1/2 Red Bull® energy drink, splash of soda. Splash of soda? You can check your purse at the door, thank you. Real baseball is back after Bud Selig's little National League-American League play date. If you didn't pay attention because you had ESPY fever, the NL totally wet-willied the AL this year. The first time since George Costanza was in charge of Steinbrenner's calzones. I think. Anyway, the shot of the night is in honor of Tim Lincecum.

The reigning, repeat NL Cy Young award winner threw a complete game shutout. He gave up 6 hits and a walk while striking out 5. The Johnson, Jimenez, Halladay trio are quite formidable but I have a hard time counting Tim out for the Cy Young. Carlos Beltran returned for the Mets and went 1-4. He's now hitting .250/.250/.250 for the season. I figured that was a sign and put $20 on 250 at the roulette table at the Treasure Chest and lost. Apparently roulette doesn't go to 250 and I was betting on a square of carpet.

Honorable Mention: Ryan Howard
Howard went 3-5 with 2 home runs and 2 strikeouts. The Phillies still got rocked by the Cubs 12-6. This would never happen if Chase Utley wasn't hurt. And Chase Utley wouldn't be hurt if more people voted for him for MVP. I have an entire thesis based on that. Unfortunately, Dave Cameron doesn't respond to my emails.

Giants Sign Dontrelle Willis, Release To Follow

The San Francisco Giants have signed Dontrelle Willis to a minor league contract. I assume the Giants are trying to catch lightning in a bottle or perhaps show their Triple A pitchers what not to do. This is Willis' 3rd team of six he will play for this season. Willis has already been DFA'd by the Tigers and Diamondbacks this year. After the Giants release him, I predict the Mets, Brewers and my backyard Wiffle Ball team (Single Humped Camels) will be next in line to hire/fire Willis.

In 2005, Willis went 22-10 with a 2.36 ERA. He led the league in complete games (7) and shutouts (5). In 2006, he led the league in hit batters. In 2007, he led the league in earned runs. Then it all fell apart. He was traded to Detroit with Miguel Cabrera and was signed to an extension sight unseen. He crashed harder than the economy in Detroit. In 8 games he posted a 9.38 ERA and failed to hit the wide side of the barn twice.

Somehow in 65.2 innings between the Tigers and Diamondbacks, Willis managed to give up 41 earned runs this season. Zach Greinke gave up 55 earned runs in 229.1 innings last year. Willis seems like a nice guy and I wish him all the luck in the world but, um, he might want to work on his Wiffle Ball slider.

Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

Tonight's shot of the night is a Home Run: 1 part(s) Vodka, 1 part(s) Triple Sec, 1 part(s) Lime Juice, 1 shot(s) Jagermeister, 1 shot(s) Goldschlager, 1 shot(s) Whiskey. Mix the first 3 to make a Kamikaze. Then set the 4 shots up as they were bases in baseball. First base is the Kamikaze, second is Jagermeister, third is the Goldschlager and the Home Run is the House Whiskey. Welcome to the club! Vomit. Yeah, that's a rough 4 shots but I had to break out the big guns tonight. The shots of the night are in honor of Adam Dunn and Buster Posey.

I'll give Dunn the top billing tonight but you couldn't go wrong either way. Dunn went 3-4 with 3 home runs and 5 RBI. It's a good thing he's not in the Home Run Derby. Instead of Dunn for the competition, I say we plug in Omar Infante and see how many infield singles he can hit in the Home Run Derby. Everybody loves a scrappy utility player, right Bud? When reached for comment, Stephen Strasburg said, "Couldn't you save like one of those home runs for my start?"

Buster Posey shares top honors tonight going 4-4 with 2 home runs and 6 RBI. Posey's 2 homers gives him (5) more than Mauer (4) in about 150 less at bats. Which begs the age old question, Bengie Molina?

Update: This post was severely delayed by the spotty Internet service I get in Baton Rouge. Come on neighbors' unprotected Wi-Fi, get your act together.

Double Shot Of The Night

Shot Of The Night is Off Base Percentage's toast to a player who had an exceptionally good or bad night. There's always a reason to drink.

I was stuck in Baton Rouge for the past two nights and had some difficulty "borrowing" the Internet from neighbors so I owe you guys a couple of shots. Plus I'll have one up later. What are we waiting for? Let's get drunk.

June 30th

Wednesday's shot of the night was King's Gold: 2 oz Crown Royal® Canadian whisky,
2 oz Goldschlager® cinnamon schnapps. And it's in honor of Felix Hernandez.

All King Felix did was throw a 2 hit shutout against the Yankees while striking out 11. A-Rod, Capt'n Jetes and Teixeira all struck out twice as Derwood invented new profanity. Just disturbing stuff. Derwood thought he was getting off the hook since I didn't have online capabilities but he underestimated my desire to toast to Yankee failures.

Honorable Mention: Vlad Guerrero
The Shot of the Night giveth and taketh away. Just as I was enjoying the Yankees' failures, Big Daddy Vladdy laid his vengeance upon his former team, my beloved Angels. Vlad went 4-4 with 2 home runs (1 grand slam) and 5 RBI. Hideki Matsui went 0-3 with a walk and a strikeout and I drank myself to sleep.

July 1st

Last night's shot of the night was a Gut Buster: 1 oz Bacardi® 151 rum, 1 oz Bushmills® Irish whiskey, 1 oz Hennessy® cognac, 1 oz Aftershock® Hot & Cool cinnamon schnapps, 1 oz Aftershock® Cool Citrus mint schnapps, 1 oz vodka. I got hammered reading just that. Who is drinking that? Anyway, it's in honor of Buster Posey.

Posey went 2-4 with a home run but he gets toasted for getting the 800 pound gorilla off of his back. That's not a metaphor. The Giants finally traded Bengie Molina and his .284 wOBA to the Rangers, opening the door for Posey to take his rightful spot as the Giants everyday catcher.

Honorable Mention: Yadier Molina
In my attempt to make this the Molina'd shot of the night ever, I give you Yadier Molina's 0-4 night. And he did that on a mere 9 pitches. Dude just loves to catch. To put that in context, Blake Hawksworth (Cardinal pitcher, for those of you who aren't his parents) saw more pitches in his 2 at bats than Yadier had all game.

Madison Bumgarner Is Competitive, Ejected

Madison Bumgarner is the Giants top pitching prospect and close to a big league promotion. His prospect ranking recently took a hit when his velocity dropped but he's still been effective and is only 20-years-old. He'd even been on quite a nice roll at Triple A Fresno until last night. In the sixth inning, his outfielder misplayed a ball and the floodgates opened. He gave up five earned and things didn't get better from there.

In the seventh inning, he blew up at the second base umpire over a call and got the ol' heave-ho. That didn't sit too well with Maddy and he ran wild, Hulkamania-style, all over the umpire. He had to be physically restrained by teammates. For the coup de grace to his evening, he launched the ball into center field before he entered the dugout. I give you exhibit A...



Alright, the kid lost his temper, it happens to the best of us. Who hasn't lost a game of Wii Bowling and fired an empty bottle of Jack into your friend's kitchen before getting thrown out of his house? We've all been there. The kid got fined and received a stern talking to and issued this apology...

"I regret my actions during last night's game in Fresno. I am a highly competitive person, but I let my emotions get the better of me. I want to apologize to the Giants organization and to the fans of Fresno and throughout baseball."

See? He's just highly competitive. Best excuse ever.