Our Obligatory Derek Jeter 3,000th Hit Post

Derek Jeter got his 3,000th hit on Saturday. It was a home run and he went 5-5. He now sports a .270/.331/.354 line this season and will continue to hit lead-off. Minka Kelly.

All right people, move along. There is nothing to see here.

Buck Showalter Tries To Downplay Comments

Buck Showalter is awesome. From what I remember, he took over the Orioles half way through last season and managed them to the Maryland state little league championship. But he's become more famous for a recent article published by Men's Journal where he made some comments about Derek Jeter and Theo Epstein which he may or may not remember. I missed that article because I was under the assumption that stuff wasn't printed on paper anymore. So here's a summary from a website...

In the article, titled "Is This Man Too Smart for Baseball?" the magazine quotes Showalter as saying about Jeter: "The first time we went to Yankee Stadium, I screamed at Derek Jeter from the dugout. Our guys are thinking, 'Wow, he's screaming at Derek Jeter.' Well, he's always jumping back from balls just off the plate. I know how many calls that team gets — and yes, he [ticks] me off."

About Epstein, Showalter told the magazine: "I'd like to see how smart Theo Epstein is with the Tampa Bay payroll. You got Carl Crawford 'cause you paid more than anyone else, and that's what makes you smarter? That's why I like whipping their [butts]. It's great, knowing those guys with the $205 million payroll are saying, 'How the hell are they beating us?'"

Showalter goes on to say that he respects both Jeter and the Red Sox organization but I prefer to imagine that he had too many lunch cocktails during that interview and threw a wine glass at a bus boy wearing a Yankees hat.

Why Does Everybody Hate Chase Utley?

I've made it abundantly clear over my months of writing here and the years at Monkeys Throwing Darts that I am an unabashed Chase Utley fan. It continues to baffle me why he doesn't get more MVP love every season. Even more baffling, Utley has zero Gold Gloves compared to Derek Jeter's five.

Brandon Phillips was solid by all accounts at second base this year. So it's not as an erroneous error as giving Jeter another Gold Glove over, oh say, me at short stop in the AL. But Utley was yet again the best fielding second baseman in the National League. As you all should know by now, defensive metrics are still in the works but we've at least advanced past the point where just looking at errors and fielding percentage gives us any kind of accurate portrayal of positional efficiency.

Personally, I prefer FanGraphs UZR (ultimate zone rating) when I'm looking at defense and that's mainly because they don't charge me for stats. Come on Bill James, I live in a basement, hook me up with the free info. Anyway, here's this year's second base UZR leaders...

1. Chase Utley 10.3

2. Brandon Phillips 9.7

3. Kelly Johnson 7.1

4. David Eckstein 6.2 (say what???)

11. Skip Schumaker -15.4

I'm going to go ahead and pretend that Utley didn't get the Gold Glove this year because he only played in 115 games otherwise I'll give myself a stroke. In case you were wondering, Utley was also the best second baseman in 2009 (11.2 UZR) and 2008 (18.4). And on another note, Skip Schumaker plays second base as well as I play poker when I'm drunk. I throw things everywhere and rarely make the right play.

Derek Jeter Dabbles In Delusion

I'm a big fan of delusion, it's why I watch the American Idol tryouts. Delusion is also why I keep writing this blog. I fashion myself as the Hunter S. Thompson of baseball writing who never leaves the basement. I also figure Johnny Depp will play me in the movie adaptation of my life entitled Fear and Loathing With No WiFi. It's just going to be Depp drinking and smoking in a basement while reading FanGraphs for two hours. I don't have high hopes for it being a summer blockbuster.

Anyway, this post isn't about me because if the rumors are true, Derek Jeter is having his own little bout of delusion. According to a John Heyman tweet, Jeter might be looking for a six year deal from the Yankees...

jeter could take awhile. #yanks may be thinking 2-3 yrs. but industry sources suggest he could ask to stay 'til hes 42 (6 yrs), a la arod.

The 36-year-old "short stop" had one of his better seasons in 2009 and one of his worst in 2010. Maybe he rebounds some from this year's .270/.340/.370 line but I doubt he's ever returning to within a mile of his 2009 .334/.406/.465 line. His defensive shortcomings at short have been and will continue to be a liability until/if he is convinced to move to an outfield spot. Even then, I have no idea how effective he'll be on defense but his bat certainly won't be worthy of a corner outfield spot.

The Yanks seem to have no choice but to re-sign the face of their franchise but giving him six years is a joke. Three years sounds like a mistake. It's a good thing I'm not a Yankees fan because I'll be laughing about whatever the outcome is for at least the next few seasons.

One final Jeter note: Minka Kelly. That is all.

Capt'n Jetes' Oscar Performance

During the final game of the Yankees and Rays meaningless battle for first place, Derek Jeter busted out his acting chops. It was quite the impressive performance too. I'm thinking about casting him in my short film Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly on Vacation. It's less of an artsy project and more of something I'm working on for TMZ. He's also pretty crucial to the project. I digress.

Chad Qualls threw an inside pitch to the .262/.330/.368 hitting "short stop" that, upon further review, hit bottom of the bat. Jeter grabbed his elbow and cried out in pain. The acting was so convincing that I assume Derek Jeter lived in Qualls basement in the offseason and watched him hit batters in the elbow while studying their reaction all winter long. It was good enough for home plate umpire to award Jeter first base after a conference and a bag of popcorn. Yankee trainer Gene Monahan even came out to check on Jeter in hopes of landing a best supporting actor nom.

Curtis Granderson followed with a 2-run home run to put the Yankees up momentarily. The Rays would eventually win the game riding Dan Johnson's one game power surge and pair of home runs. Afterward, Jeter seemed proud of the acting even though I'm disappointed he didn't give any credit to the numerous actresses he's dated. From the AP...

Jeter, who stood doubled over while receiving attention from a trainer, confessed that the ball hit the end of his bat and he sold the call to Barksdale with a good acting job.

"He told me to go to first base. I'm not going to tell him I'm not going to first, you know," Jeter said.

"It's part of the game. My job is to get on base. Fortunately for us it paid off at the time, but I'm sure it would have been a bigger story if we would have won that game."

Indeed, Derek, indeed. He has to be a lock for the Entourage movie, right?

Curveballs for Jobu

Curveballs for Jobu is Offbasepercentage's daily trip around the ballparks.

Today's honorary bay boy is Choo Freeman and he's here because he's Torii Hunter's cousin.

I haven't forgotten about you guys but it's been an almost Internet-free week for me in Baton Rouge. I'll try to make it up to you if I ever get a steady stream of stolen borrowed WiFi.

Rockies 6, Padres 4. The Rox make it back to the top billing after a couple of losses. The Rockies run their September record to 11-4 but remain 2.5 games out of first. New blog favorite Troy Tulowitzki went 3-5 with 2 more home runs and 7 RBI. Tulo has 11 homers and 27 RBI to go with a .361/.409/.984 line in September. Yikes. Adrian Gonzalez also smacked a pair for the first place Pads.

Rangers 11, Tigers 7. Not much quality pitching to be found as the Rangers cruised to their 7th straight win. Vladdy hit his 27th home run of the season proving last year was just a fluky down season. He's back to a respectable .305/.348/.506 line while I yell profanities at my computer every time Hideki Matsui gets an at bat for the Angels.

Angels 7, Indians 0. Speaking of my Halos, Jered Weaver pitched a 7 inning gem, striking out 7. He leads the league in strikeouts (218) and is 5th in ERA (2.96) and FIP (3.05) but with a 12-11 record won't sniff many CY Young votes. Catching prospect Hank Conger got the start for the Angels and went 1-4. The aforementioned Matsui went 1-3, jerk.

Rays 4, Yankees 3. The Rays flip-flopped back into first place on the ridiculous power of Dan Johnson who hit his 4th and 5th homers of the season. Capt'n Jetes showed off his acting chops, hopefully more on that later, after a ball almost hit him. By almost hit him, I mean hit his bat. But he's the almighty Jetes so he was awarded first base. That would draw the ire of Joe Maddon and he'd end up getting tossed. I really don't like the Yankees and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Orioles 3, Blue Jays 1. Pitching prospect Kyle Drabek made his debut for the Jays last night. It wasn't the cleanest outing but the kid is only 22-years-old and the Orioles have been much better under the guidance of the Buck Showalter express. Drabek went 6 innings allowing 3 runs on 9 hits and 3 walks while striking out 5. The future is bright for the Blue Jays rotation. Crazy Jose Bautista hit his 47th home run. I've kind of become fascinated by the Blue Jays.

The Off Base ESPY Preview

Ah, the day after MLB's All Star Game. This is usually the slowest sports news day of the year but there has been plenty of action today. The Braves traded Yunel Escobar and Jo Jo Reyes to the Blue Jays for Alex Gonzalez and a couple of prospects. The Atlanta Hawks dealt Josh Childress to the Phoenix Suns in a sign-and-trade. And some soccer player named Theirry Henry, who I can only assume is well past his prime, signed with the New York Red Bulls. Look at me writing about non-vuvuzela soccer news. I'm well-rounded.

Alright you got me, it' still a pretty slow news day and there aren't even any baseball games to look forward to. But we do have the ESPYs in live fashion tonight. Hoozah. Actually, I'll admit I'm a little excited because the New Orleans Saints figure to clean up. Let's take a look at baseball's role in the award show...

Best MLB Player: Zach Greinke (KC), Derek Jeter (NYY), Tim Lincecum (SF), Joe Mauer (MN), Albert Pujols (STL)

The nominees are last year's AL and NL MVP and Cy Young winners and Derek Jeter. I don't plan on being shocked when Jeter wins it either. But I'm going to take a look at WAR just so we can see who was the most valuable.

1. Zach Greinke 9.4 WAR
2. Albert Pujols 8.7 WAR
3. Ben Zobrist 8.3 WAR
4. Justin Verlander 8.2 WAR
5. Tim Lincecum 8.2 WAR
6. Joe Mauer 8.0 WAR
7. Chase Utley 7.6 WAR
8. Derek Jeter 7.4 WAR

Greinke's season was simply spectacular but who are we kidding? A pitcher from Kansas City isn't winning Player of the Year in a fan voting competition. I figure Pujols will be Jeter's biggest competition while my sentimental favorite, Chase Utley, gets overlooked once again.

Best Team: Alabama football, Chicago Blackhawks, Connecticut women's basketball, Los Angeles Lakers, New Orleans Saints, New York Yankees

Personally, I like hockey. I played for a long time. But I think it's adorable if they think they're winning anything but Best Hockey Player. I think the Yankees have a legit shot at winning here but the Saints are just about going to be the favorites for everything. Which is fine by me.

Best Male Athlete: Drew Brees (NFL), Kobe Bryant (NBA), LeBron James (NBA), Jimmie Johnson (Nascar), Albert Pujols (MLB)

Again, I'd be down right shocked if Brees doesn't walk away with this awards. The image of him holding his son after the Saints won the Super Bowl still chokes me up a little. Pujols might be able to finish second if Kobe and LeBron split the basketball vote. I will admit Jimmie Johnson had an amazing year turning left. Okay, I made that up. I have no idea what he did last year.

Best Game: Twins beat Tigers in extra innings (AL Central one-game tie-breaker), Canada edges USA in Olympic Hockey championship game in overtime, Duke gets past Butler in the NCAA championship

I think the baseball game has a great shot here. But Duke did win a championship with their game. I do know that Canada beating the USA in hockey has no shot. You should also know that I'm terrible at predicting anything involving sports and I make a pretty mean Philly cheese steak.

Best Coach/Manager: Geno Auriemma (Connecticut women's basketball), Joe Girardi (New York Yankees), Phil Jackson (Los Angeles Lakers), Mike Krzyzewski (Duke men's basketball), Sean Payton (New Orleans Saints), Nick Saban (Alabama football)

I assume Payton is the favorite here. I realize I'm a pretty big Saints homer but what he and Brees have done with this franchise is unreal. There isn't another franchise that means as much to its city as the Saints mean to New Orleans. So bringing a championship to New Orleans gets Payton and Brees immediate hero status. Sorry but that rant was inevitable. I'm surprised I lasted this long. In baseball, bad managers can cost teams more games than good managers can win games. The difference between good managers is negligible.

Best Breakthrough Athlete: Brittney Griner (Baylor women's basketball), Chris Johnson (Tennessee Titans), Stephen Strasburg (Washington Nationals), John Wall (University of Kentucky basketball)

If Strasburg doesn't win this, I'm rooting for him to start firing 100 mph fastballs at Seth Meyers. The Strasburg hype machine has been on overdrive this summer and he's fresh on people's minds with the All Star debate. I wouldn't recognize Brittney Griner if she walked in wearing her jersey.

Castrol Edge Performance Under Pressure Award: Sidney Crosby in the Olympic hockey gold-medal game, Landon Donovan in U.S. soccer's win over Algeria in the World Cup, Brett Favre in his return to Green Bay, Stephen Strasburg in his MLB debut

Crosby probably had the most pressure on him to win the Gold for Canada in Canada. Donovan had the biggest USA moment. Strasburg had the most impressive performance. So Brett Favre will win. Strasburg's 7 inning, 14 strikeout and zero walk debut was pure dominance. He flashed his 100 mph fastball and mixed in a 91 mph change up. He kicked off Strasburg-Mania and sells out road stadiums like he's the Beatles.

Best Sports Movie: Big Fan; Invictus; The Blind Side; The Damned United; The Karate Kid

This has nothing to with baseball but I loved Big Fan. It was pretty dark but Patton Oswalt was tremendous. I'm sure The Blind Side will win but go watch Big Fan. Oh and The Karate Kid? Hahahahaha *cough* hahahahaha