Grady Sizemore's Golden Sombrero

A golden sombrero is awarded to a player who manages to strike out four times in a single game (real golden sombrero not included). It's quite the feat unless you're Ryan Howard or Mark Reynolds. Unfortunately, no-hitters and Brian Wilson's beard are all the rage nowadays. Not for me, though. I will pour over the box scores to bring you the finest at swinging and missing.

Starting in 2005, Grady Sizemore was one of the most exciting young players in baseball and looked like a future MVP. A legit 30-30 guy, Sizemore posted a 5.8 WAR in 2005, 8.0 in 2006, 6.2 in 2007 and 7.4 in 2008. In 2009, injuries started derailing his career. He made it to the plate just 140 time in 2010 and, with one DL trip in the books, ZiPS projects 378 plate appearances for 2011. And he wasted 4 of them on Sunday. But I feel bad for Grady so here's a sad dog wearing a sombrero.

Top 2nd: Sizemore struck out swinging against Jeremy Hellickson. To be fair, Hellickson had some pretty good stuff.

Top 4th: Sizemore struck out swinging against Hellickson again.

Top 7th: Sizemore struck out swinging against Hellickson. Sizemore struck out 3 times, the same way against the same pitcher which is an MTD Hat Trick. Why isn't this catching on yet? Somebody get Baseball Tonight on the phone.

Top 9th: Sizemore struck out looking against Cesar Ramos. Sizemore watched 3 straight pitches to end the game.

Girl Charged With Stealing Nude Pics Of Sizemore

The villainous Intertube Grady Sizemore stalker has been charged with a gross misdemeanor for stealing nude photos of Sizemore after a little Facebook stalking and hackery. Grady's Ladies nod their head in gratuitous approval. The Cleveland Indians superstar center fielder, when healthy, sent some NSFW photos to his Playboy Playmate girlfriend, Brittany Binger, sometime in August 2009 because nothing turns chicks on more than pictures of yourself naked in mirror shots. Despite what all of the retraining orders that have been filed against me by Hollywood actresses would have me believe.

Here's what the Star Tribune had to say...

An Apple Valley woman was charged on Tuesday with breaking into a model's e-mail account and stealing racy photos of Cleveland Indians baseball player Grady Sizemore, which were widely posted on the Internet last year.

*snip*

Leah M. Ayers, 19, has been charged by the city of Apple Valley with two counts of unauthorized computer access, a gross misdemeanor. She could not be reached for comment.

I blame this entirely on Sizemore's girlfriend. They tell you what a good security password is now and I'm sure gradysizemoresgrrl24 wasn't too hard to break. My friend Chris got it on his 4th try. He doesn't even like baseball which brings up a whole new set of questions.